Life has thrown us a pretty big curveball around our house the last two and 1/2 weeks. When I say almost everything about the way we live our lives has changed, I mean it. I've hinted at it in a couple of posts but there is no denying it now. There have been no walks around the neighborhood after the rains, no cycling up the canyon (for Scott-I never did that-let's be real), no gardening projects in preparation for spring, no Saturday night date nights out to a favorite spot in town, no spontaneous dance parties, no entertaining and no...well, fill in the blanks. There are number of nos in our life right now. For Scott there has been almost non stop pain from a newly herniated disc. For me there has been the helpless feeling of wanting to soothe someone in the worst pain of his life. He knows what this pain is all about since he had 2 previous back surgeries over 20 years ago.
The recovery took a year.
There have been regular physical therapy sessions recently doubled in length, x-rays, an mri, pain medications, acupuncture, the purchase of an inversion table, ice packs, warm baths, trips to the pharmacy, daily and nightly outdoor spa sessions, repeated calls to the neurosurgeon to get an appointment as soon as possible and the cancellation of our sunny vacation to Riviera Maya for this coming Sunday. We needed that trip--as a relief from the stress of our jobs--and the current 3 month long recovery from Scott's shoulder surgery. That trip has been my motivation for getting through a very stressful work year. Though he would likely be fine with the trip once we are there, it is the two long flights to get there that are the concern. We simply can't risk it at this point.
We have watched a number of movies and many episodes of International House Hunters (one of my faves), had way too many carb laden meals (comfort food is a REAL thing turns out). All plans for regular yoga sessions and self-care have gone out the window, with the exception of one long-planned massage for me which worked out the kinks. Thank you, Gerardo! We have both struggled with the blues; sometimes at the same time, but thankfully we've mostly taken turns on that one. It's depressing for us both to have Scott staring down another surgery and much lengthier recovery than what we've just been through.
We've shed some tears together, for the pain, the anxiety and the fear; and we've also had some laughs. Some big old pee your pants kind of belly laughs. Some of what is happening right now is so ridiculous. You have to bring it every now and then with the humor to cheer your partner up. We've also been more likely to notice the regular parade of deer out our back windows, seen some awe-inspiring sunsets and rain storms off the back deck. For all that we are more than grateful.
Maybe the lesson is that you become grateful for the littlest things when life throws you a big curveball.
If you would, please send up a good thought or prayer for Scott and his healing this week.
The best news in the world would be that he doesn't need another surgery.
This post is completely unedited or proofread....
sometimes you've just got to keep it real
(and punctuation is completely uninteresting to me at this point). xx